Transitioning Between Seasons

The rollercoaster ride that is March and April in Minnesota

We are in the thick of March weather here in Minnesota. It is not my favorite¹. While other parts of the world might think of March in that charming way that life bursts forth from, the sun and color return to their dreary landscape, renewal and rebirth, etc. In Minnesota it is slower, wetter, colder, snowier and still dreary. Not the traditional spring experience March² is broadly considered. There are no budding trees, I am not packing up my winter clothes or coat.³

March in Minnesota

Last weekend there was a blizzard, churches closed Sunday morning as it blew in when everyone was supposed to be worshiping⁴. This weekend it will be near 70 degrees and sunny. And then back to 40’s and 50’s with clouds and sun and rain and more clouds and some 30’s. The usual March experience. Back and forth, up and down as we slowly warm and head toward summer. Odds are, we will have more snow between now and the end of April as well.

We have been in winter here for the last few months. The quiet, the cold, the resting and waiting and sometimes suffering experience that is winter. And as I was thinking about this very slow and honestly painful transition we make here into spring, I thought about the transition from the wintering seasons of life into the brighter and sunnier seasons as well. In my experience that movement from one personal season to the next is often a lot like Minnesota March. Not always comfortable, not always my favorite.

Also March in Minnesota

Last summer was a winter in my personal life⁵. As I think about my recovery process once the crisis had past and it was time to return to my life, it was exactly this sort of spring. Days where I felt great and days where I wondered if I would ever feel good again. Days where I had peace about the experience and days where I was angry and wondered if I would ever move on. Days full of energy and days I wanted to stay on the couch forever. Back and forth between the cold and the warmth, the light and the dark. The sunny days and the cloudy, misty rain. And a few days of full on snowfall. Is spring ever going to come? Is the weather ever going to be good again? How long will it be cold? How long, Oh Lord, how long?

The winter is easier in some ways. There is something clear about what that season should be. Stop. Rest. Recover. Renew. Survive. Whatever you manage is enough. Expectations are low. But spring, while it brings so much hopefulness and anticipation, can also be a rollercoaster of expectations and impatience. I am done with winter, I want summer now. I don’t want to be patient. The back and forth motion of spring weather can make me nauseous.

I love old fashioned roller coasters.⁶ The rhythm of going around a track, slowly up, quickly down and then clacking along the flat track around the corner to the next hill. They make me a little nauseous but they also rev my adrenaline, they excite my system and feed my adventurous nature. They also force me to trust, trust the ride, the park, the people who inspected it and the people who are currently running it. Without that trust the ride is an exercise in terror at all the things that could go wrong and the ways I could die while locked into my seat.

Actually April in Minnesota. And yes, that requires a bottle of wine.

March and April in Minnesota are like that. The spring of life is like that. Adventurous with a rhythm of ups and downs and a few gentle turns around the corners. The main question is, “Will I trust the process?” Will I trust this crazy ride is leading to summer, gentle breezes, legs hanging off the dock into the lake, hikes in the green and lush woods, picnics in the park, warmth. Is all that coming? Do I believe and trust in that future? Is it worth pushing forward and staying on this rollercoaster ride to get where I want to go?

Spring can be hard and it is tempting to just go back inside and continue our hibernation, stay in our cozy den, on our comfy couch and hide from the work of returning to the world. It’s hard to trust that it is safe to return, that we can trust the people, the experiences, the life we live, and the God we believe in will guide us to better place, sunnier days, warmer weather and renewed strength. Even when we have an unexpected and uninvited snowfall on a Sunday morning when we were looking forward to worshiping.⁷

Every season has it’s challenges and no season is without a task. There is preparation that goes into wintering, the sowing that goes into spring and nurturing that goes into summer before we have the fall harvest. And day to day, month to month, year to year, that same work, those same patterns, come around again and again in various parts of my life. I’m learning to enjoy this rollercoaster ride of life, the ups and downs. To move with the rhythms instead of fighting them. And trust that God is directing me towards something more than I could have imagined.

So I am enjoying the sun today which is quickly melting the weekend’s snowstorm while keeping my boots and shovel nearby. Enjoying a walk around the neighborhood some mornings and a walk on my treadmill other mornings. And occasionally staying in bed and hiding from it all.

What season of life are you in today?

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We are back from our amazing Europe trip. Many more words in the future but it was wonderful and I am so thankful for the ways it really has expanded and fostered my imagination.

Pinch me! Paris!

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I found this poem in “The Country Diary of an Edwardian Lady” by Edith Holden. It is in the March section of the book. Thought I would share.

Lines written in Early Spring

W. Wordsworth

I heard a thousand blended notes

While in a grove I sat reclined;

In that sweet mood when pleasant thoughts,

Bring sad thoughts to the mind;

To her fair works did Nature link

The human soul that through me ran

And much it grieved my heart to think

What man has made of man.

Through primrose tufts in that green bower

the periwinkle trailed it wreathes,

And tis my faith that every flower

Enjoys the air it breathes.

The birds around me hopped and played,

Their thoughts I cannot measure,—

But the least motion which they made

It seemed a thrill of pleasure.

The budding twigs spread out their fan

To catch the breezy air

And I must think, do all I can,

That there was pleasure there.

If this believe from heaven be sent,

If such be Nature’s holy plan

Have I not reason to lament

What man has made of man?

1. And by not my favorite I mean I hate March weather. As I have asked in the past…Why did my ancestors settle here??? What were they thinking?

2. Google March little girl birthday party ideas if you are ever unsure that it is different in the rest of the world. There are no outdoor March tea parties happening here I can assure you.

3. I honestly still wear my gloves until it is reliably 60’s. Why have cold hands just because they won’t freeze anymore?

4. Technically we were in Paris but we got the emails from church and texts from family.

5. Well, That Wasn't the Plan

Surgery went wrong last summer. I spent 4 months on my couch.

6. I absolutely do not like the new kind designed to terrorize and torture, to scare you and cause you to wonder about your life choices as g-forces pin you to the seat and you fly around a track at every angle spinning upside down and right side up so fast I am not sure my hair even moves. Not a fan.

7. And it was the one Sunday of the year to sing St Patrick’s Breastplate which is our favorite. Well my favorite, I think half the church loves it and half wonders why we have to drudge through it. And fair enough, it is a mouthful, but great words and it so worth it. Our worship leader always tells us to take a deep breath and get ready before we start. ha ha